The Lank Tank

Why so serious?

Archive for the ‘– Fakeme’ Category

Embarrassing iPod Songs

Posted by lanktank on September 3, 2009

Inspired by Fakeme and Kleppie; what songs do people have on their iPod that they like, but know are embarrassing to admit?

Come on, we all have a couple of songs that, you know, “I copied from my friend and just never took off the playlist” or “I thought I was downloading a different song…”

I asked around where I work, friends etc and these are but a smidgen of the songs people have come clean about… “Yes, this is on my iPod and I like it…”

Cruel Summer – Ace of Base
I’ll Make Love To You – Boyz II Men
See You Again – Miley Cyrus
The Climb – Miley Cyrus
7 Things – Miley Cyrus
(Ok, I think we’ve established it’s embarrassing to have Miley on your iPod)
The theme song to Hannah Montana (aaahhhh!!!)
That’s What I Go To School For – Busted
Mmmbop – Hanson
I Give My All – Mariah Carey (the remix version)
Dirty Pop – Nsync
SOS – The Jonas Brothers
Return of the Mac – Mark Morrison
Greece Lightening Music Medley

Think you have worse? Let us know… come on, ‘fess up!

Posted in - Fakeme, - Kleppie, - LT | Tagged: , , , | 6 Comments »

Guy I wouldn’t kick out of bed – Gael Garcia Bernal

Posted by lanktank on June 17, 2009

A Fakeme pick

GND is AWOL and I’m uninspired, so this week it’s a Fakeme choice. And she has chosen: Gael Garcia Bernal.

A very good choice indeed. Her reasons for choosing him (I’m typing as she dictates over my shoulder) are:

“He’s South American, yum, and was amazing in Motorcycle Diaries. He seems like the kind of guy who isn’t entirely aware of how good looking he actually is which in turn makes him even more good looking. He also hasn’t sold out to Hollywood which is admirable.”

Gael is in the upcoming movie Blindness if you wanna check him out/stare etc.


Posted in - Fakeme, Guys we wouldn't kick out of bed | Tagged: , , , , , | Leave a Comment »

Eskom: Thinking smart…

Posted by lanktank on June 9, 2009

For once.

Fakeme sent this to me… you’ve probably all seen it but I still think it’s post worthy. Remember the days of all the cut outs… damn! Don’t want to go jinxing it!

Don’t mention the power! I mentioned it once but I think I got away with it…

Eskom… don’t screw us again…please… And 24, season 7 has just come back (Mnet Action channel), so it’s really not a good time…


Posted in - Fakeme, - LT, Pics to checks | Tagged: , , , , | 7 Comments »

Integrity or Friendship?

Posted by lanktank on May 11, 2009

I suppose it was bound to happen sometime and even though I thought I was prepared for it, it’s harder than I ever could have imagined…

Fakeme…got…Crocs. Nnnooooooooooooooooooooooooo! Why did one of my friends have to go and do that? And not just a friend, my housemate! Someone I share a bathroom and marmalade with every single day.

Oh, she has her “reasons;” Her and Kleppie are going on the Otter Trail in Storm’s River and she needs them for hiking through the river and rock bits. She also noted that she got them on discount and would never have paid the full price. But are these excuses really good enough? And then we go see a movie the other night, (Slumdog Millionaire…I rated it) and as we’re walking out the door, I look down and guess what she’s wearing? The Crocs!

So, I’m guessing they’re not just for hiking now but for all purpose, casual evening wear too. Why did she have to go and buy them? What do I do now? I suppose disown her as a friend. The problem is that we live together, I also do rather like her, but she owns Crocs!

The only plus is that she didn’t purchase Crocs in one of their really offensive colours, like those bright pink or green highlighter colours they have on offer. So when one looks at us perhaps walking to the movies together, they may not be immediately drawn to the fact that she’s wearing a pair or plastic, clog shaped, clown shoes with deliberate holes inserted over the entire top half of the shoe.

The negative now is that she torments me with them every day. Last week I opened the cupboard where I keep my cereal and guess what fell onto my face? Her left Croc!

Damn you Fakeme… Damn you!

Posted in - Fakeme, - LT, Things that are Rubbish | Tagged: , , , , | 2 Comments »

Sick… oh so sick

Posted by lanktank on January 14, 2009

Dearest All,

I haven’t forgotten about The Lank Tank, I’m just oh so sick at this current time.

I’ve narrowed it down to the following:


A. That tuna I ate

B. A stomach bug…. I know those suckers are going around

C. Fakeme is trying to posion me (She may have her reasons although I am unsure)

When I recover I will be back.

In the meantime, Girl Next Door sent me this… I think quite fitting. The picture is titled: January


Posted in - Fakeme, - Girl Next Door, - LT | Tagged: , | Leave a Comment »

Seafood Paella

Posted by lanktank on January 8, 2009

Mini Crisis at the LT and Fakeme apartment! The freezer froze over and we had to defrost it. By “we” I mean me. Someone had left the freezer door open (I say Fakeme, she says me) and the snowy powder ice had turned to full blown icicle ice, which was melting at a rapid rate. Basically all the food either needed to be cooked instantly or thrown away.

As I was in the defrosting process I separated all the food I knew was mine and all the food I presumed was Fakeme’s .Then I left for her a message to either throw her pile of food out or eat it. As Fakeme and I work at different times, a lot of our communication is made in the form of post-it notes or messages on the fridge.

When I got home later that night, from what I could see Fakeme had obviously received the message and sorted out all her food from the freezer, except for one item – The Seafood Paella packet. My assumption was she had obviously decided she would cook it when she got home.

The next day I woke up and in my daze, staggered towards the kitchen. As I walked in, I was blasted by the vilest, fishiest and most vomit worthy smell I have ever encountered. Let me assure you, at seven ‘o clock in the morning, this is not the way you want to start your, already predictably, shite day. Being half asleep and considering the possibility that I may actually be in an Ek&J factory, I ran to open the windows. As I grabbed a dish cloth to cover my nose and mouth, I looked up, and there it was…Seafood Paella packet… Read the rest of this entry »

Posted in - Fakeme, - LT, Things that are Rubbish | Tagged: , , , , , , | 3 Comments »

R.I.P. Pigeon 2

Posted by lanktank on November 21, 2008

Kleppie is Fakeme, the housemate’s, boyfriend. The nickname Kleppie is derived from the word kleptomaniac, which he is. I say this because a few weeks ago I caught him stealing my toothpaste… not just some of the paste, but the entire tube itself. I called him on it and he claimed it was an “accident” and that our toothpastes look “similar” but I don’t buy it.

I’ve tried to tell Fakeme that we’re dealing with our own Winona Ryder and action must be implemented. I know his game, he’s going to clean us out, item by item, and by the time we’ve noticed the dining chairs have gone missing, he’ll be half way to Botswana. Yesterday, the cheese slicer disappeared, I’m almost certain it was him but I have no proof.

However, Kleppie does read my blog, and after reading R.I.P. Pigeon, he sent me this, and boy did it make me laugh… Read the rest of this entry »

Posted in - Fakeme, - Kleppie, - LT, Uncategorized | Tagged: , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments »

The Driveway Incident

Posted by lanktank on November 17, 2008

Fakeme and I live in an apartment above a block of shops. I say “apartment” because it’s not really a flat and it’s not really a house so I went with “apartment” but it does sound very Americanish feel to it which wasn’t the intention but let’s roll with it.

Because we live above a block of various shops (the bottle store is a bonus), the road gets very busy and occasionally (by “occasionally” I mean often) we find cars parked in front of our driveway. Again, I say “we” but for some reason this NEVER happens to Fakeme. Many times, I have tried to get in or out of our driveway but am blocked by some big ass Bakkie, Land Rover, Jeep (it’s always the big cars) and Fakeme thinks this is hilarious!

I, on the other hand, begin perspiring blood and random thoughts of murdering people with an ice pick flow through my brain. Read the rest of this entry »

Posted in - Fakeme, - LT, Things that are Rubbish | Tagged: , , , , , , , | 2 Comments »

The Coke Zero Experience

Posted by lanktank on November 12, 2008

Last Friday, a group of us decided to go watch a couple of bands at The Assembly. Now I love The Assembly but there have been a few buzz-kill bar experiences (like waiting over 30 minutes to get to get a drink) which have brought down the: “Enjoy-ability of the night vs amount of Hunters Dry in my body” ratio. It’s not the most dignified confession to make but a huge portion of my clubbing nights depend on how easily accessible the alcohol is from the bar to my lips.

I clearly wasn’t the only person who was a little worried about the pending night out because when the masses arrived at my house for a pre-Assembly drinks warm-up, a number of them had brought the necessary elements needed for a successful middle-of the-evening car bar – Vodka and Coke Zero 500ml bottles. Now I know what you’re thinking; being 24 and all I really should be steering away from cheap, student life manoeuvres but in my defence, it wasn’t my idea (although I was ashamed I hadn’t thought of it first) and the main instigator of it ALL was 27! So… not really sure how any of that defends my point. Moving on… Read the rest of this entry »

Posted in - Fakeme, - LT, Loxions | Tagged: , , , , , , , , | 3 Comments »