The Lank Tank

Why so serious?

Archive for the ‘– LT’ Category

Guy I wouldn’t kick outta bed – Gavin Rossdale

Posted by lanktank on November 19, 2009

I really wanted to do a musician… um, for my GIWKOB post… and thought; “Hey, this will be easy…” but when I started searching it turned out: Uh, it wasn’t so easy.

The thing is, most musicians look as sexy as hell when they’re up on stage, singing, jamming, playing guitar with sweat dripping off them… in that hot, “I really want you” kind of way.

But when you’re looking for a photograph of them… it turns out, a lot of them aren’t the sex symbols you see when you’re at the concert…. a couple 100 metres away.

Shallow? Yes. Fickle? Of course. But this is a competition and all I have is a picture to work with.

Anyway, not wanting to deviate from my “theme” I suddenly remembered: Gavin Rossdale. This British hottie, married to Gwen Stefani and the front man for the band Bush, is a very good pick. Not only is he “rock ‘n roll” and super, rad cool; but he seems like a great husband and father. Everything a girl looks for. Also, he’s not one of those “metrosexuals…” – how would I know you ask? I don’t.

I'm just sitting here, shirtless, biting my nail in deep, concentrated thought

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Anyone else? #15

Posted by lanktank on November 16, 2009

Anyone else get those loose pieces of skin at the top of their finger nails, and it hurts? Oh it hurts! Need more calcium.

Anyone else digging the new Paramore album?

Anyone else thinking about bringing the word “Kiff” (or “Kief”) back in? It’s a challenge, yes. But are you up for it?

Anyone else remember anything from Geography class in high school? I mean, I went to class, but what did I learn?

Anyone else ever think about chucking it all in and starting their own beet farm?

Anyone else so not ready for another week of same shite different day?

Happy Monday people.

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Results and Request

Posted by lanktank on November 13, 2009

Results:

Of the September 2009 polls….

And the winner of the “I’d tap that” poll is… drum roll…. DMeister! With his pick of Jennifer Ellison! You remember her, right? She’s from the UK and is not only an actress but a model and potential singer too? Still not? She had the blonde hair and the really big boobs in the white dress? Ah, yes, just needed to jog your memory.

Anyway, second place was FirstChild with Nicole Scherzinger and Kappie’s Pamela Anderson coming in 3rd. C-Dawg was dead last with Ivanka Trump. She scored zero in fact. C-Dawg, you didn’t even vote for her. How do you expect others too?

And for the GIWKOB…. the winner for September…. a TIE! 50% each. It seems the world is equally split between vampires and rugby players. Interesting. Nice contending Luwie… we’ll see what the battle for October brings.

Request:

The October polls are up! Click on the Take Your Pick tab at the top of this page and get a votin’!

I’m going to put it out there. Out of the girl picks: I don’t think DMeister’s going to take this month. October has some stiff contenders and I think we’re in for a surprise.

Prediction for the  boy picks: Luwie has some strong choices. It should be in the bag, but you never know.

Good luck to all. And Godspeed.

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My highlights of the week:

Posted by lanktank on November 12, 2009

– I went to an aKing concert and the singer only bitched about the sound check 8 times as opposed to 26 times like he usually does.

– I made chicken pitas using the Nando’s sauce and it was glorious.

– I attended Hailstorm’s grandfather’s 70th birthday party and they made him a cake with 70 candles on it, which he blew out! All 70!

– I watched ‘Back to the Future’ and still liked it.

– I spent a gift voucher which I’ve had a year to do, and DMeister said I’d forget before the cut off… but he was wrong. I used it.

– My boss hasn’t been at work for 3 days.

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Those People…

Posted by lanktank on November 11, 2009

There are various social situations which become the norm in life and when one breaks away from the norm, it’s not inspired but rather annoying and they should be castrated for such actions. I’m referring to

Those people:

–    Who ask how you are, to which you reply; “Fine thanks and you?” Only to have them respond; “Oh, not well.”
Great, now I know where the next 25 minutes are going. You suckered me into asking how you were only to blab about how your boss sucks and you’re considering quitting to join a conservation expedition for a year or 2 so you can find yourself.

–    Who ask too many questions when you barely know them. Can we not stick to the basic chit chat? I don’t know you and clearly we haven’t made a “friendship” connection so; let’s just stay with the weather and what we do for a living shall we? I’m not comfortable enough with you to talk about my dead Manchester Terrier or the fight I had with my best friend last week. And I’m certainly not interested in your hernia operation or the awful experience you had at the salon. It’s awkward, so stop talking.

–    Who have to explain a joke to you after you’ve just made it. It’s like; “Yes, thanks for breaking it down for me. I almost forgot why it was funny. Phew, you’re a life saver.” You know what isn’t funny? That.

–    Who don’t know when to end a conversation. You kind of know them and run into them in the mall. You make the usual; “fancy meeting you here,” and “so what brings you here,” comments and then it’s time to wrap things up. But they don’t. They just linger there, never taking the opportunity to walk away. Even when you say things like; “Aaaanyway…” and “Well you look at the time…” they still don’t get the hint. Why? Why won’t you leave? Walk away!

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To hide or not to hide…

Posted by lanktank on November 10, 2009

Kappie and I went for lunch the other week. I ordered the chicken mayo sandwich with avo. No tomato. I remember specifically requesting no tomato because I made some joke about it and we all laughed, or at least pretended to laugh.

Then Kappie comes along with his one chicken burger (but with no relish, hold the gherkins, add a slice of cheese and a crispy bun, not the brown seed one and only a half portion of lettuce) order. Blowing my request, right out of the water!

So of course, our meals arrive; Kappie’s is to perfection. Mine however, the understated yet classic  chicken mayo, had tomato.

Now, I’m not one to complain. Ultimately I can just pick the tomato off, no harm no foul. And in the end, I don’t blame the deli; I blame Kappie – with his perplexing, picky, order…confusing people everywhere in the world, all day, every day.

I said as much to him. He didn’t care as he munched away on his idyllic sandwich, smirking as I picked off each tomato slice, almost as if he had calculated it all to go down this way.

As I finished the sandwich, all that was left on the plate was one lettuce leaf (the garnish on the plate vibe) and the 4 massive slices of tomato.

Now, for some reason, I felt bad. The deli guy is lovely and when he comes to take the plates away he’s going to see all the tomato and remember that I asked for no tomato, which will make him feel bad. So I began attempting to hide all the tomato underneath the lettuce leaf. At this point Kappie queried what in world I was doing (although he did say, “world”).

I explained my reasoning to which he counter-argued. He felt that if I left the tomato on the plate but didn’t say anything, they’d see they made the error but think; “How nice is LT that she didn’t say anything. There goes an upstanding citizen.”

Interesting. 

To hide the tomato or not to hide the tomato.

For those still reading this, I’ve decided to wrap this up as I’m really going nowhere… So, after much debate, I ended up hiding half and leaving half.

Not too sure what statement that made.

Just putting it out there. Which one would have done?

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Things one prefers not to endure when hung-over:

Posted by lanktank on November 9, 2009

Sunlight

The noise of a vacuum cleaner

Steri Stumpie – it seems like a good idea… until it begins curdling in your stomach

The smell of tequila

The taste of tequila

The word “tequila”

Salad

The distance from your bedroom to the bathroom… “Why don’t they build the toilet right next the bed??”

The dentist – for you and him both.

Friend calling to recapture every event and moment of the previous night.

Parents calling to ask why they never see you anymore and what you’re doing… with regards to your life.

Riding on horseback

Clubbing seals

Listening to Justin Timberlake

Brushing your hair

Singing in the shower

Oil spills in the Atlantic

Any movie by Disney

Ok so; some of these aren’t necessarily “hangover” specific. But I needed to fill the page.

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Remember

Posted by lanktank on November 4, 2009

that time when it was November and hot and I had nothing to write?

Work was shite, my lips were red… like redder than normal lip red. Super red.

I always wear a hairband around my wrist in case I need it. But more often than not I don’t wear it and it just ends up cutting into my arm. It leaves a dentation in my skin. This cannot be healthy yet I’ve done it my whole life.

Is there a connection between this and the super red lips?

Probably not.

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FNB lameness

Posted by lanktank on November 3, 2009

I’m not a member of FNB and not necessarily against them per se, but their new advertisement makes me want to pick up my clay horse and throw it at the TV.

It’s something about being “In this life” and it’s one of those adverts where it’s just writing, like 3 words at a time, popping up on the screen and it goes on and on and on and did I mention on? And every 2 lines, it repeats the line “In this life…” which I think is meant to be deep and poetic but in fact, comes off, stupid and pretentious.

A few of the lines I remember, are something about not blaming others and everyone loses parking tickets and bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla! It’s so long and irritating, yet I continued to read it. And every time the line, “In this life…” popped onto the screen, I felt a burning anger, erupting inside of me and it wasn’t my tuna mayo sandwich I had for lunch.

And I know what you’re thinking, well, at least you remember the ad and that it’s for FNB. But the problem is, I remember it too well. It was too irritating. So every time I think of that advert now or walk past an FNB ATM, I feel resentment towards them; that they made me sit through a minute and a half of crapness.

Yes, it’s only an advert but I think I feel strongly on this one.

Oh well, I guess it’s my fault for watching Oprah after work.

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Exams are over

Posted by lanktank on November 2, 2009

But my hangover is not.

It was DMeister’s birthday party and he had a little shindig (is that how you spell “shindig?” Am I even saying it right?) at his place.

There was a lethal punch, too much tequilla (I just paused. I need a moment, even just to type the word), beer pong and a very hairy mustache.

Night was awesome…. well, what’s remembered of it anyway.

Kappie and C-Dawg were also there. I remember at the beginning of the night, C-Dawg mentioning that he couldn’t stay late because he had an assignment due… then I also remember hours later being on the same beer pong team as him.

DMeister is still man down… it’s nearly 24 hours later.

Good times.

Something rad for a Monday: http://videos.antville.org/stories/1940679/

 

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