The Lank Tank

Why so serious?

Posts Tagged ‘dancing’

Wedding Watching

Posted by lanktank on March 24, 2009

This blog entry was brought to you by Kappie

Last Saturday LT, D-Meister and I had a wedding out in Franschoek. Knowing the drive was long and that we didn’t have a place to stay, Kappie decided to step up to the plate and drive.

It felt good…surprisingly. All I did was just sit back, relax and enjoy all the other peoples’ antics. There were some good ones, but first off straight after the wedding a small toddler… yes, toddler, needed to be fed and the mother was not shy to feed it in front of everyone at the reception. Now, I’m all for boobs, but there’s something mildly uncomfortable about a boob being used for what it was originally designed for. This of course didn’t stop a snappy guest trying to steal a photo of this natural happening, but all that came out was some blurry people constantly getting in the way…not that I took the photo or anything.

Moving on to the starter at the dinner table, I had no idea what to make of it. There were some weird looking leaves that looked like they were picked from my garden in a salad slash biltong dish. Not to mention a ball of doughy stuff as well as a soup bowl the size of a shooter glass that I thought was salad dressing. To top it, there was some actual corn flakes; you can imagine my surprise when there was no milk and sugar.

Other than that, the wedding was really great. The beer was flowing (although I had no part of it) and then the dance-floor opened up. This is when things got tricky for some. The DJ’s mistake was when he had drums, shakers and tambourines and let everyone play with them to the music. This turned mainly into interpretative dance because no one had good rhythm or coordination and you know things are getting bad when D-Meister is trying to coach someone on the drums. Just when the dance-floor was getting at its busiest, a secretive guest decided to let rip with the vilest smelling fart I have ever smelt dispersed itself among us. I thought the roof of the building was going to fly off.

After much more dancing and gassing, the time had come to make the long trip home. Loading LT and D-Meister in the car only took 30 minutes and as soon as LT hit the seat she was fast asleep. D-Meister was a trooper until he found the seat-belt, made a pretty good semi-hammock with it and fell asleep with his body leaning forward while the seat belt caught and supported him.And there he rocked.

This left me with only one thing to do; sing…

On the road again. Oh, I just can’t wait to be on the road again…


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Dancing… not so much

Posted by lanktank on March 15, 2009

We’re at the Dirty Skirts on Sunday – who else went? Anyone?

And it wasn’t your typical Kirstenbosch “chill out on the grass and listen to the band play its tunes” event. Well, it was for the people at the back but not so much for the front as a lot of people in the front got up to dance along to the music.

Opting to remain one of the “sitters” in the front, close to the stage, I wasn’t upset that I couldn’t actually see the band anymore, nor was I a little peeved when someone stood on my wine glass. What actually got me a little preturbed was the dancing itself.

Man, there are a lot of people who point blank cannot dance. I didn’t realise there was so many out there? I’m talking about maybe 94% of the people dancing were horrific. I couldn’t believe it.

And I’m not saying I can dance. I’m probably as awful was the girl who looked like she playing “Simon Says” and this is what is bothering me. Are we all really that bad? Because think about it: Usually when you’re dancing you’re at a club with lights and strobe lights and disco ball lights and did I mention the lights? There is so much going on in a club that you can’t help but look like you’ve got skills. Not to mention you’re usually holding a drink in your hand so at least you look like you have something to do.

But here, out in the open, in broad daylight with no where to hide… it looked like something out of Lord of the Flies. My God. There was one guy, which I’m sorry, no strobe light could even save, who looked like he was half making an aeroplane pose and half jumping up and down like he was stepping on hot coals. At this point I turned to look around: GND was upset, C-Dawg looked perplexed, Kappie thought it was a joke and Dmeister reached for another beer. The whole thing was just uncomfortable, like when two people are sucking face in front of you; you don’t want to watch but it’s happening right in front of you so how can you not?

And now it’s got me worried. If I’m ever at a concert and feel the urge to break out into to dance, all I’ll think about it Hot Coals Aeroplane guy and withhold the urge to get my rock on…probably for the best… but a piece of me is sad nonetheless.

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