The Lank Tank

Why so serious?

Posts Tagged ‘February’

What’s the crew getting up to for Valentine’s Day: Part 2

Posted by lanktank on February 11, 2009

This time it’s Kappie and GND, what are they planning this February the 14th…

Kappie:

Bullsh*t for my Valentine

Valentine’s Day is this Saturday and I think we all know what that means. Of course, single ladies looking to party and Jimbo and I have the perfect plan.

You may or may not have heard of a type of party known as the ‘traffic party’. Jimbo calls it the ‘traffic party’ because he says his bedroom will be like a main intersection but with girls instead of cars. For now I’ll just stick to the real meaning: Three colours may only be worn to this party. Red if you’re in a relationship, yellow or orange for it’s a Facebook “complicated” and green for single to mingle…just like C-Dawg for the rest of his single little life.

A popular club in Kenilworth has a ‘traffic party’ every year and Jimbo and I have finally decided to test the waters with a devilish plan, if I do say so myself. We are going to wear ALL three colours in case different scenarios arise. I’ll be using the green shirt primarily to get myself out there and then cleverly change to red if I get a level three cling-on who doesn’t understand I’m not her ‘pookie’. Oh and the yellow one is my particular favourite. The yellow will be used on those tough nuts to crack and will allow me to play the sensitive guy. I imagine something along these lines will surely take place:

Kappie: (acting sad, emotionally strained and puppy eyed)

Girl #43: “Why so down?”

Kappie: “Just leave me alone.”

Girl #43: (intrigued by my abruptness) “What’s the matter?”

Kappie: “You won’t understand.”

Girl #43: “Try me.”

Kappie: “Well…it’s this girl I’m kind of seeing…I just don’t think she appreciates my feelings etc. etc. etc. blah, blah, blah”

She’ll follow by saying that she thinks I deserve someone who does appreciate me, while I ‘tear’ myself apart saying that I don’t think I do; all the more pulling her ever closer to this emotional trap.

Jimbo says it’s a full proof plan and I tend to agree with that, I mean what’s the worst that could happen?

And Girl Next Door?

GND will be joining the Black Hearts Club this Valentine’s Day. And not in a weird sadistic way, just play-play. Silly games. In fact I’ll have my hot, witty, well-built, intelligent boyfriend with an 8-pack waiting for me at home when I get back, obviously, but that’s beside the point. I choose to be with friends on this day. Friends who aren’t as lucky to have a love like I do.

Back to the point – we’ll be attending the Stormers game at Newlands this Saturday. And by we I mean my single friends. That constitutes approximately 6 of us. The rest of the crew have teamed up with their worse/better half and are going out for dinner / going away for the weekend / eating chocolate dessert off each other and the list goes on. Icky. I think I just got sick a little bit in my mouth.

It should be an interesting day, seeing as the last time I watched a bunch of big sweaty men run after a weirdly shaped ball was… well lets be honest… never. I’m not sure if you can tell but I don’t think I’m what you’d call a huge rugby fanatic.

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