The Lank Tank

Why so serious?

Posts Tagged ‘weekend’


Posted by lanktank on November 27, 2009

YAY People! Friday! And you know what that means… tomorrow is Saturday! WOOHOO!

I’m going to eat a burger this weekend.

I’m going skydiving this weekend.

I’m meeting Oprah this weekend.

I’m joining the Free Masons this weekend.

I’m selling Lemonade this weekend.

I’m hunting a shark this weekend.

I’m swimming the English Channel this weekend.

I’m making a paper plane this weekend.

I’m lying a lot about what I’m doing this weekend…. eating the burger may happen. I can’t guarantee the rest. Even my paper planes are shite.

But its weekend!!! And I have Monday off. WOOHOO! It’s the little things, I know.

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Friday people…Friday!

Posted by lanktank on November 28, 2008

And it couldn’t have come a moment too soon. Jesus this has been a long week. I think it’s because the weather has been good. When the weather is good, you end up resenting (more than usual) the fact that you’re in the office.

There is nothing more painful than waiting for the time to pass… you will notice I have chosen to write this incredibly pointless and disappointing blog entry. I apologise to anyone reading this. I wish I could make it better or at least make it funny. Wouldn’t you like to read a funny blog entry? Something to pass the time, even if only for a minute. One sweet, blissful minute of non-stop smiling and laughter, maybe even a tear, something you can think back on and say, “Man, that was a goodie. That made the excruciating pain of Friday all worth it.”

Well, you’re not going to get it here, not today anyway. I’m too weak, too desperate, too longing for the end. I went to make some tea earlier. That always kills four and half minutes but they’ve changed the milk brand and the new one blows. So, yes, I wasted some time but got lousy tea in return and that just makes me sad. Can’t I catch a break?

What’s the time now… 16h02! Oh come on! I swear to God, the clock is going slowly on purpose. I’m counting, “One crocodile, two crocodile” and it’s going much quicker than this “computer” clock. OK, now it’s 16h09… I had written other lines during these last seven minutes but chose to delete them. One was about Me vs. Machines and the other was about energy in the morning. Neither was very good so I removed them. Although I’m telling you about it now and it’s not like this sentence is any more entertaining.

One thing happening this weekend is I’m off to a “celebrity” themed birthday party. The catch is you get told who to be on the invite. I’ve been asked to go as Courtney Love. Apparently my friend perceives me as a drunken crack whore. Probably not that far off…

Have a lekker naweek ek se!

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Pirates and Parrots

Posted by lanktank on November 21, 2008

It’s the end of a very long Friday, C-Dawg and I have reached new levels of crapness…

LT: C-Dawg! Nearly weekend!!

fuck ya

C-Dawg: fuck yeah or fuck ya? Coz they’re not the same thing

LT: yes sorry fingers went a little fast there…hit the enter too soon

C-Dawg: lol

LT: they’re close though, I mean, I meant yeah…but thinking about it now, what’s wrong with ya?

C-Dawg: In some countries yes

LT: well, in this country C-Dawg. I’m talking to u. This isn’t a public announcement; I’m not addressing the United Nations

C-Dawg: they busy chasing pirates anyway

i was just saying, with all this pirate stuff

LT: yes

C-Dawg: I haven’t seen any parrots or eye patches

these pirates really shld be kicking it more old school

at least the leader shld set an example

LT: yes…certainly not the same pirates we see in Pirates of the Caribbean

C-Dawg: well, it’s a damn shame if u ask me

LT: it’s hard to find those hats these days

C-Dawg: yeah, i guess so

parrots r still widely available though

LT: yes, African Greys are as common as your standard goldfish (I have no idea)

My gran used to have one named Bruce

he swore a lot and had the sound the phone made when it rang down to a fine art so you’d go pick up the phone and then hear coming from the cage “hehehe… fuck you”

C-Dawg: i had a cousin called bruce; he did pretty much the same thing

we also kept him in a cage

parrots seem too vicious, i don’t like the idea of a pet taking my finger off

LT: we eventually gave him to the world of birds

C-Dawg: i never see parrots eating crackers, with or without cheese

LT: well then C-Dawg, you have never lived

C-Dawg: indeed, sometimes I feel that way

i’m spent, my week is officially over. Well, technically it ended somewhere this morning

LT: ya, I’m done. Keep the peace

C-Dawg: Until next week.

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